Thanks to reader Nhat Ha who suggested I blog about the website My Life Is Average. I actually like it better than the sister sites FMyLife.com and LMyLife.com!

Some of my favorites:

Today, my friend explained to me that if you write 3.14 on a piece of paper and hold it in a mirror, it will say pie. Mind. Blown. MLIA

A while ago in my AP Chemistry class, this one annoying kid and my friend were having a weird argument about who was better. The annoying kid said, “Well, at least I have a girlfriend!” to which I responded, “Whatever. Your girlfriend has 67 protons.” In response, the entire class, including the teacher, turned their heads to look at the periodic table on the wall. The element with 67 protons is holmium, with the chemical symbol “Ho.” My teacher was the first to laugh. MLIA

A few weeks ago, the CA in my dorm put up some signs about STDs and pregnancy. One of them said “Abstinence is the only 100% effective way of avoiding pregnancy.” One morning I noticed that someone had taped next to it a picture of Mary and Jesus with the caption “99.9%” MLIA.

Today, I received a call saying that my son had been lying in school, and it had reached a point where he needed to be sent outside. I don’t have a son. That kid is a good liar. MLIA.

Today I joined a new website and used the word “penis” as my password. The website said my password was too short. MLIA

Today I was babysitting my neighbor’s little boy. I asked him what sound a cat makes. He said meow. I asked what sound a cow makes. He said moo. Then, to fool him, I asked what sound a walrus makes. He replied with Ku Ku Kachoo. Coolest kid ever. MLIA

Today, I received a letter in the mail saying that I would not be given the American Express credit card I requested earlier because my job wasn’t good enough. Oddly enough, I work for American Express. MLIA

Check out the rest at My Life Is Average.