Remember when I used to post every weekday??

Well I’ve decide while I am on maternity leave to resurrect the good ole days of this website until at least the baby comes. We’ll see how long she gives me! ;)

I’m still undecided about the format of my daily posts but I think there might be more personal posts than you are used to. I will try to keep the more mundane stuff (what I ate today photo shots) to my instagram feed. But no promises that I won’t be posting some recipes once in awhile since I plan on cooking some recipes that are at the top of my “to cook” list!

Also, instead of keeping links to a friday post…I may just sprinkle them here and there. I have a huge backlog of friday links that I bookmarked…not sure how relevant they still are but I’ll post ones that I find still interesting.

I hope there are still people out there reading! If not, it’s ok…I mostly do this for my own enjoyment anyway :)

It finally hit me when I found out a girl I know who is also pregnant and due in May just had her baby yesterday…there is going to be a little person in our family soon! Up until now, I was not really scared or nervous because I was so miserable being pregnant that anything seemed better and all I could think about was the relief I would feel when I no longer have all of these pregnancy symptoms. But then I finally started thinking about what a big change this is going to be. I have many worries and now I’m full on anxious and kind of scared…here is what’s on my mind:

– the pain of labor. I know if it gets bad I can get an epidural and people tell me once you get the epidural it’s not even that bad but I hate needles and hospitals and all that junk. plus I’m so out of shape I wonder how I will have the endurance and stamina to push a baby out of me ??? and thinking about the catheter and all of the after pains. there is so much that just does not sound fun. and it all seems so…foreign…I guess I won’t know what it’s like until I go through it. I just hate the unknown! ugh!

– how will my life be different? i can honestly say i’m pretty happy with my life…i’m throwing a big wrench in my life and from what i’ve heard it includes lots of crying, responsibility, and no sleep. and I get SO grumpy when I don’t get enough sleep. double ugh!

– how will my relationship with boyrobot change? our relationship is not perfect but i have to say we work well together and i absolutely think he’s the best partner for me and i’m so happy with us. what’s going to happen when we throw a baby in the mix? boyrobot can barely take care of himself…am I going to resent him if he doesn’t pull his weight?

– what is it like being completely responsible for a whole other person? will i still have freedom? am i going to miss “me” time? it all just sounds so tiring! i will definitely miss the times when i can just be lazy and DO NOTHING…i feel like i won’t get that anymore and that scares me.

most people who know me know that i’m just a kid myself. i’ve never even changed a diaper before. i love kids but honestly i get bored playing with them after an hour ha ha. this kid will be all mine and i won’t be able to return her after i get bored or tired of her. i suddenly feel ill-equipped to handle a child. i guess i was never really ready but people who have kids tell me you never are. it’s just scary when you are completely happy with your life and you have a big change coming up…know what i mean?

anyways, i’m really anxious right now. In exactly 4 days I will be full term and the baby could be here any day now…i just can’t believe it !!!!!! and even though i’m petrified at the thought of being a mother, i am excited to go on maternity leave. i just hope the baby stays inside long enough for me to enjoy it!

I’m 32 weeks now and it really feels like there is an actual baby inside of me. In the beginning when the baby moved, I wasn’t even sure it was the baby or not. Now it feels like there are arms, legs, and a head in there and she is constantly rolling around and moving. Sometimes i’ll feel a hard spot on my stomach and I will touch it….and then the hard spot moves away and I am left wondering which part of her body that was! I love feeling her move because it makes her seem so real and also confirms that she is alive and kicking in there. I am still in disbelief sometimes that there is a person in there. It blows my mind daily.

It’s getting so close to the end….eeeee I can’t wait to meet her!!!!

Is it the pregnancy hormones or did these two things make you cry too?

Beautiful wedding story

Father comes homes from Afganistan disguised as Captain America

And this made me lol:

Is it possible to run a marathon without training?

Before I got pregnant, I remember a coworker telling me to keep a journal throughout the whole thing and how helpful it was to look back for future pregnancies. My cousin even got me the cutest elephant baby journal. I also had big plans to take weekly photos of my growing belly. Then I got pregnant.

And all I wanted to do was forget that I was pregnant because I was SO miserable. I had no motivation do anything including cooking or crafting and least of all blogging or journaling! (As you can tell by how much I’ve updated this blog in the past 7 months).

Well finally at the start of the 3rd trimester, I am starting to feel a little bit normal again. At least mentally. Physically I’ve grown to an uncomfortable size and am really sleepy during the daytime since I can’t get a decent night’s sleep to save my life. BUT mentally…I have motivation again. I’ve actually been cooking and crafting again. It feels great! And I figured I should probably do a recap of this pregnancy while it’s still sort of fresh in my mind so I can look back on it in the future.

1st trimester symptoms:
– really sleepy and tired all of the time. I remember coming home from work and wanting to go straight to bed. Which is really weird because I am a night owl and usually go to bed at 12 or 1am every night!
– extremely hungry. I think I gained the most weight during this trimester. I wanted to eat ALL of the time and if I didn’t eat I felt horrible like I hadn’t eaten in days. It was a hunger I’ve never experienced before
– constant nausea and vomiting in the mornings (especially when brushing my teeth). I found that eating preggie pops helped (thanks Cheryl for introducing this to me!) but none of the other tricks in the book worked (crackers, ginger, etc…did nothing for me!)
– depression. I don’t really know if I was truly depressed but I remember staying home from work one day and laying on the couch ALL day and I couldn’t move. I was so miserable and when Minh came home I just cried. I physically felt like I could not do anything…leaving the house was out of the question. This feeling was the worst that day but I felt some of it a lot throughout the 1st and 2nd trimester. It was especially hard to go to work and I ended up blowing through my vacation days a lot. Good thing I had a lot saved up and have understanding coworkers!
– having to pee all of the time. Most people get this more near the end but I remember distinctly it was worst for me in this trimester. I would get up 2 times a night to pee!

2nd trimester symptoms
– I was really excited to enter into the 2nd trimester because I heard it was so much better…nope it wasn’t. I wasn’t as sleepy as the first but that just meant I was awake for more of the nausea which did not get any better. Somewhere during this trimester my nausea changed. It was a different type of nausea. Preggie pops no longer helped and I’m guessing it’s from the heartburn/acid reflux I got
– heartburn/acid reflux. Some days I feel the burning/pressure in my chest. Most days I have a horrible constant lump in my throat. I also get heart palpitations which I have read can be due to being pregnant/acid reflux. And probably the most ANNOYING symptom ever is the amount I burp. I literally burp 100s of times a day. It’s insane the amount of pressure I feel in my chest and throat. And burping will relieve the pressure for like 1 sec (totally not worth it) so it does not make me feel better at all. I find myself waking up in the middle of the night and burping. The first thing I do when I wake up is burp. OMG….i hate it so much!!!!
– being sick all of the time/the cough that never ends/cracked rib. I was also sick a lot in the 1st trimester and being sick and pregnant was the worst thing ever. And every time I got sick I developed a dry cough that took forever to get rid of. I would get sore stomach muscles from all of my coughing so that every time I coughed it felt like someone was stabbing me in the stomach. One time I got in the car and heard a loud crack near where I had a strained muscle from coughing and I can only think it was a rib. It was so loud and painful. I couldn’t move. A month later it’s finally starting to feel better but if I press the area I still feel pain.
– this is also the trimester where I threw up in the car and had the worst pregnant day of my life!
– leg cramps/charley horse. Luckily this only happened a handful of times for me. They are the worst!
– started feeling the baby kick more which was exciting
– itchy stomach…It got so bad I had to buy some stretch oil. Not really sure if it helped much though
– slow hair growth. This was one of the few GOOD symptoms I got!

3rd trimester symptoms
– loss of sense of smell. Actually this might have started somewhere near the end of my 2nd trimester. Most women get a heightened sense of smell…nope of course I get the opposite. It’s actually starting to come back a little though. This also made certain foods taste really weird to me. I remember eating a lobster roll at my friend’s wedding and it tasted like toothpaste but everybody was saying how good it was! I was so sad.
– lump in throat. still have it and it’s worse as ever.
– restless leg syndrome. I wake up several times a night feeling like I have to move my legs. Which sucks because it’s so hard to move now that I am so big. Just flipping over is a really big ordeal for me. This has also made me more sleepy again during the day.
– got some of my motivation back! I’m cooking and crafting again…can’t wait to show you guys the stuff I made.
– overall this is definitely my favorite trimester. I remember getting my hair cut and the stylist was also pregnant and she was telling me the 3rd trimester was the best. Even though I am very uncomfortable physically…I feel mostly great inside. I still have nausea in the morning and sometimes during the day but so far I haven’t thrown up (knock on wood). And the nausea hasn’t been so constant…only about 50% of the days now I think…or maybe I am so used to it I forget. Speaking of…it’s been so long since I felt normal that I can’t imagine what it will feel like when I am no longer pregnant. My biggest fear is that this lump in my throat, the burping, and the nausea never go away…it just feels like it’s a part of me now! Ahh….I will be so sad! :(

Now that I can see the light at the end of the tunnel, I am starting to get excited about the baby arriving. I used to be scared of labor but now I can’t wait! I’m so curious to see what the baby will look like and what kind of personality it will have. I’m still nervous about the actual taking care of a little person but I know I will have lots of help. It’s so weird to think about adding another person to this family though. Sometimes when boyrobot and I are sitting around watching tv, I imagine how it would be different with a baby in the mix. Such a weird thought!!!!

The baby is also kicking so much and the kicks are so powerful. I can see my stomach bulging and shaking sometimes. I am also starting to already feel love for her. I find myself thinking “I love you Emma!” and hoping she is staying healthy in there. Sometimes boyrobot thinks that I am too lax with how I am treating this pregnancy since he is always paranoid about EVERYTHING but I worry too…I just don’t show it as much. I wonder if that is what parenthood is always going to be like…constant worry over your child about things you can’t control! I’m anxious for the baby to be out so I can physically see that it’s healthy…being pregnant and responsible for growing this person inside of you can be very nervewracking. Sometimes I look down at my huge tummy and I’m in disbelief that there is an actual person INSIDE of me!!! It’s going to be so surreal when she comes out and they place her in my arms!

Anyways, I think that pretty much covers my pregnancy although I am sure there are things I have left out or blocked from my memory hehe. Overall I hate being pregnant. Like seriously hate it. It is/was the worst time of my life but I know it will all be worth it in the end! The other day I finally met another person that hated being pregnant. She was telling me about how she had tmj/lockjaw during hers…wow….so glad I did not have that! Other than that I think everybody else loves being pregnant so I guess I am not the norm. I have about 7-10 more weeks to go!!!

A few pictures from the baby shower my sister and cousins threw me this past weekend.

Front door with my sister’s hand dyed bunting

An amazing diaper cake from my cousin. I loved this…we needed diapers!

Favor table. I loved the glassine envelopes my sister sewed with the most beautiful elephant cookies inside.

My sister covered my house with these bouquets in mason jars. So happy I now have a bunch of mason jars to reuse! :)

Pretty elephant cupcakes

Cupcake push pops….these were my fave!

Cookies…my sister made all of the desserts by the way

The iron a onesie station. My sister cut out a bunch of decals that people could use to iron onto a onesie. I’ll have to take a picture of the finished products..they are all still hanging in my living room!

It’s a girl heart paper straws…so cute

Mini cherry pies

It’s us! We’re going to be parents soon….eeek!

Chocolate lollipops my cousin made. Loved these!

More pictures of the pretty dessert table

Our main food was catered Viet food that my MIL ordered. It was really yummy! Loved the decorations in this photo too.

One of the many fun games we played. This one is where the guests try to guess my waist size.

This one is guess the baby food. We actually had a tie so the two winners had to see who could eat a jar of baby food the fastest. It was hilarious!

Then my camera died. Boo. One of my favorite games that wasn’t shown here was when they passed out advice cards and we read them as I opened each person’s gift. Some really funny stuff…mostly how I should make Minh do everything :)

Thanks to my sister and cousins for throwing the best baby shower and thank you to all of my friends who came and “showered” us with love and such generous gifts. We can’t wait to meet our little one!

This video makes me want to stop taking pictures of my trips and just make videos!

A Taste of Vietnam from Daniel Klein on Vimeo.

In my attempt to bring back my “creative” side, I signed up for this e-course about art journaling. It provides 52 prompts/themes you can use as inspiration for your journal pages. I really miss blogging and feel like I should be writing more during this important time of my life. Perhaps this will help! The e-course is meant for a real journal book but I’m way too lazy for that…so I’m just going to blog my thoughts and perhaps share some pictures on here. I would like to do a real journal too one day but I need to build up my art stash some more!

Anyways, the first prompt is “Daydreams” and I’m going to try and do a blog once a week having to do with the theme.

I can’t lie. My daydreams definitely have to do with our future baby. I really have gone “baby crazy” the last few months. I notice pregnant mamas and little ones everywhere. They all just seem SOOOOOO CUTE! I’m still really scared of having my own but I definitely love kids!

I daydream about what our kid will be and look like. Will it look more like me or boyrobot? Will it be shy and a homebody like me…or funny and outgoing like boyrobot? Will it like sports? Reading books? I’m so excited to find out!!!

I also daydream about all of the things we would do. I hope she (yes, we found out it’s a she last week!) does like sports so boyrobot can teach her how to catch a ball and be a cute little tomboy.

But at the same time I hope she will love cooking and crafting with me!

I imagine all of the family traditions we will have. And I hope that she has a childhood that was much like mine. Filled with lots of imagination, fun, and friends. I remember building forts with blankets in our living room and playing house with my siblings.

If I am ambitious enough, I would love to build her a teepee like this:

I remember playing night tag, catching fireflies, and spending countless hours outside with neighborhood friends.

I can’t wait to take her places, go on roadtrips, or even travel overseas. I would like to instill in her the love of travel and adventures that boyrobot and I have.

I imagine changing my first real diaper, cuddling with our new baby, and yes all of those sleepless nights we will have and what it will be like. Will we get lucky and our baby will be a good sleeper? Or will it keep us up at all hours of the night? I can only imagine what it will feel like when the baby comes….to be responsible for this littler person who solely depends on us. The thought is just so weird!!!

BTW, I can only hope that our girl is half as cute as the babies in these pictures!!

Honestly, 2011 has been a complete blur. I barely remember the first half and am just consumed with the fact that I was pregnant and miserable the last half. In fact, I am sitting here on my bed feeling completely nauseous with an unbearable pressure in my throat (heartburn?) and a sore tailbone. I’m SO uncomfortable!!

So my new year’s resolution is to stop complaining so much about being pregnant. So with that, I am done. I’m honestly really happy and excited to be pregnant. I just hate being pregnant. So I am really looking forward to 2012 when I get to meet this little babybot and hopefully I can feel comfortable in my body again! I used to dread the thought of labor but now I can’t wait…if it means all of these symptoms go away with it! I can deal with 24 hrs of pain….at least it’s over with. These 9 months of misery are feeling like forever.

Ok really, now I’m done. :P

My other new year’s resolution is to take more pictures. I should have started at our new year’s party. So I already failed at that. But I’m going to try really hard to change that!

There’s so much for us to look forward to and be excited about in 2012. I really can’t wait!! I’m anxious to see how we’ll deal with parenthood and what kind of little person boyrobot and I have created heheheh. I’m looking forward to becoming a real family and starting our own family traditions. I’m excited that a lot of our friends have kids already or are pregnant. It makes the whole process seem less daunting than what it once was. All of my friends with kids have been so wonderful and helpful. And I’m so happy our kid will have tons of friends to play with!!

Lastly, I just wanted to wrap up this post with a thanks to all of my friends, family, and especially boyrobot for making my life extra special. 2011 is the last year that it will just be me and boyrobot. I know it will be bittersweet…because I have absolutely enjoyed these past few years with the amazing adventures we have gone on. I will miss all of the things that we did that probably won’t be as easy to do or plausible to do once we have a kid. I used to feel like I would never be ready to give those things up, but I’m finally in a place where I am looking forward to this. We will still have adventures…they’ll just be different kinds of adventures. And honestly, boyrobot and I are kids at heart so I know we are going to have tons of fun with this little one. And we’re lucky to have a great support system around us so we can sneak in some date nights if need be.

So with that… here’s to 2012…it will truly be a year for big changes!

Wow. Has it really been since october since I last updated? Remember when I used to blog practically everyday? Boy, have things changed. And I am not just talking about my blogging habits…

yup….there’s a baby bot growing inside me! it still freaks me out to think about it. This ultrasound was only at about 12 weeks. I am 16 weeks now. We will soon find out if it’s a boy or a girl. I can’t wait!!! A lot of people ask me if I want a boy or girl….I honestly don’t care. I think it would be fun to have a girl (someone to craft and cook with!), but I’m also scared of having to deal with a teenage girl in the future. Boys seem to be easier but I wonder how I would “connect” with a boy. Either way, I think it will be fun and challenging.

Boy, the past 4 months have just been so dreadful to me. I honestly hate being pregnant. I don’t feel like myself at all…I no longer do the things I enjoy. I just have no motivation or energy to do much and just feel nauseous most of the day. The only thing that has gotten me through this is boyrobot who has been kind, patient, and super understanding. I can’t wait to see how he does as a father. He sometimes worries about what kind of Dad he will be but I know he is going to be an amazing dad because I know what kind of person he is. It’s comforting to have someone like that to go through such a big ordeal with.

Anyways, I just wanted to check back in here and let you all know that I’m still alive (if anyone is still reading this). I will try to blog more often….and I will probably be blogging more personal stuff since I don’t really surf the web much anymore. One of my new year’s resolutions will be to take more pictures…so hopefully I have more interesting stuff to share too!